Oh yes you know I lost my child a while ago. No, no please. Don’t look away and change the subject, It’s ok. You see at first I couldn’t feel, It took so long, but now it’s real. I hurt so much inside you see, I need to talk, Come sit with me?
You see, I was numb for so very long, and people said, “My, she is so strong.” They did not know I couldn’t feel, my broken heart made all unreal.
But then one day, as I awoke I clutched my chest, began to choke, such a scream, such a wail, broke from me.. My child! My child!
The horror of reality. But everyone has moved on, you see,everyone except for me. Now, when I need friends most of all, between us there now stands a wall. My pain is more than they can bear, when I mention my child, I see their blank stare.
“But I thought you were over it,” Their eyes seem to say--No, no, I can’t listen to this, not today. So I smile and pretend, and say, “Oh, I’m ok”. But inside I am crying, as I turn away. And so my old friend, I shall paint on a smile, as I have from the start. You never knowing all the while, all I’ve just said to you in my heart.
Love,
A grieving mother
There will be no wall, no moving past it and no blank stares from me. I will do my best to be right beside you always, except for the times that I will step behind you to hold you up if needed.
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That's amazing...so true.
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