Happy 2nd Birthday in heaven!

Balloons to heaven

The annual Balloons To Heaven with the Compassionate Friends happened in July. I've been meaning to write about it for awhile now, I just haven't gotten around to it yet.

Every year we meet at a park, share some good times with other grieving parents... and then send off our balloons with notes.



I hope the note got to you safely in heaven my dear sweet Aurora. Mommy loves you.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl

Aurora sweetheart, Happy Birthday.

I broke down today, only once. I couldn't keep it inside me any longer. The way we celebrated your birthday today should NOT have been the way to celebrate it. We should have not had to visit you at the church. We should not have had to send letters to you to heaven. We should have all been together, laughing, cooing, and watching you smash your cake all over your face.

I was talking with another baby loss momma, who recently went through a 1st birthday as well. It's so hard to feel like anything your doing is the correct thing to do to celebrate your birthday. Nothing felt right, because this wasn't the way it was supposed to be. This isn't what I had dreamed about for you.

I hope you know how many people love you. I think your balloons should prove that.


So many, with wonderful notes just for you!
I do hope that you enjoyed your cupcake! This is always the kind of cake I had in mind for you.




Your father and I are not happy with the little mischievous act you pulled on us today. Your daddy and I both had letters for you... and we also had a card. How come everyone elses letters made it, while ours got stuck?




Daddy and I are going to send more letters up tomorrow. I hope those make it to you safely.

I love you my sweet Aurora.

And as the evening ticks on. It's almost 11:59pm... the exact moment you were born one year ago. So close to midnight and a brand new day. So close, to be exact... the clock changed no more than 5 seconds after you were born.

Until we meet again in heaven. I'm glad to know you're there watching over me. I love you so very much my sweet darling. I'm sending you all of my love, today and always.

Balloons to heaven

Bittersweet. I think that's the perfect word for today. It was a sweet day, a celebration... but it was also difficult. The bereaved parents support group I attend had a celebration today. The whole reason for this celebration was for us to write notes to our children, attach them to a balloon and send them away to heaven.



I hate the fact that I had to write that note at all, and the reason why we were all there. But it felt nice to send it. Jason and I tied our balloons together. Jason said he liked my note better, which was quite funny because I liked his better. I know that Aurora will love both of them equally.